What to expect in your first psychodynamic therapy session

Before your first therapy session, it is common to spend time wondering what you are supposed to say. Whether you are doing it right. Whether you will seem too anxious or not anxious enough, too much or not enough of whatever it is therapy requires.

You do not need to prepare anything. There is no right way to show up.

Here is what a first session actually looks like. I will ask what brought you in. Not in a formal intake way, but as a genuine question. What is happening in your life that made you decide to call? You tell me what feels relevant. I listen.

From there, we follow what comes up. I might ask about your history, your relationships, what your life looks like. Not to fill out a form but because those things matter for understanding who you are and what you are dealing with.

I am also paying attention to something else in the first session: what it feels like to be in the room together. Therapy depends on the relationship between therapist and client. The first session is as much about figuring out whether we are a good fit as it is about gathering information.

You will probably leave the first session with more questions than answers. That is normal. The work does not start with a clear map. It starts with a direction.

One thing I tell people at the start: there are no wrong things to bring. If something is on your mind, it belongs in the room. The things people think are too small to mention, or too strange, or too embarrassing, are often exactly the things worth paying attention to.